tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-83661642011-04-21T16:46:46.753-04:00this is your lifeCecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.comBlogger2221100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-69849650002110113452007-04-25T02:57:00.000-04:002007-04-25T20:39:44.691-04:00

Something strange happened last night. I woke up because somebody was knocking at the front door. I had been dreaming, and my dream had strangely evolved around the noise. But now I was awake, and it was not just knocking. It was more like some lunatic or a desperate & scared person was punching and kicking on the door. I had friends sleeping over in my room, but they were fast asleep. My mother

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-6861335844846781832007-03-14T03:49:00.000-04:002007-03-14T03:58:30.275-04:00

Again. And 3, and 4. Like yesterday, the day before and so on. Another 12-hour work day, no lunch break, mad pressure & still can't fucking sleep. Can't think straight.Could get something done. Like learn Russian or learn how to knit multicolor muffles or solve a Rubixcub with my butt cheeks. But nooooo... so much more fun to curse at Bob Rock on TV while he's turning Metallica into a joke.

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-15401397547650379972007-02-26T21:40:00.000-05:002007-02-26T21:43:32.930-05:00

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1171959596955990212007-02-20T03:27:00.000-05:002007-02-20T03:40:14.626-05:00

Since those good old high school fire drills, you know what to do. All it comes down to is leave everything behind and go. Now.For a drill, it works. You know that eventually you'll go back to your desk and that goddamn test will still be there waiting for you. In real life though, you want to make a couple of exceptions. I leave everything behind except my passport and immigration papers. oh,

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1165559236058662882006-12-08T01:18:00.000-05:002006-12-08T01:35:54.110-05:00

These last months, it's like all of my friends have decided to invite themselves as guest stars in my dreams. One after another, I see them in composite places of New York, Grenoble, Lyon, Paris, B.l.V., Marseille.France is everywhere. I'm in a bar that probably no longer exists in the South of France, knocking my knuckles hard on the counter and thinking, I'm really back, this is not a dream

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1165558041220393362006-12-08T01:01:00.000-05:002006-12-08T01:07:21.233-05:00

Some people, you love them so much you think life would be much easier if they were just dead. Because then maybe you could really forgive them.

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1162707230043054312006-11-05T01:13:00.000-05:002006-11-05T01:19:44.040-05:00

Brooklyn, 2006

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1158124777811778242006-09-08T03:00:00.000-04:002006-09-13T01:31:52.413-04:00

DJ Krush - Irving PlazaSomebody handed me a $700 (+tax) digital camera, a photo pass, a free ticket to DJ Krush's show and asked me to bring back pictures for their newspaper...Why not?

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1156832137820158932006-08-26T03:57:00.000-04:002006-08-29T02:19:59.826-04:00

Il s'est mis à pleuvoir juste comme nous sortions du bar. Le temps de descendre les marches et de faire quelques pas et les trottoirs étaient des miroirs tachés de rouge et de vert et de jaune et des lumières des néons. Elle n'avait pas de parapluie et moi je n'en ai jamais non plus. Il pleuvait vraiment fort et tout près il y avait une terrasse couverte. Seuls, nous avons attendu là que l'orage

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1156485666745122042006-08-25T01:58:00.000-04:002006-08-25T02:19:56.990-04:00

On ne joue plus sur le terrain de basket du quartier. Au pied du grillage, des bougies gardent l'entrée.

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1156221090877022382006-08-22T00:23:00.000-04:002006-08-22T00:31:30.893-04:00

Au bout d’un moment, c’est forcé, on veut essayer de faire rentrer l’âge dans toutes les équations. On se dit que ça doit arriver à expliquer des choses qu’on peut pas expliquer autrement.Comme cette furieuse envie de baffer tout ce qui bouge, par exemple. Ça faisait pas ça, les autres fois. Les autres fois où j’ai arrêté de fumer, c’était pas facile mais au moins c’était pas cliché. Tandis que

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1155959722650815202006-08-18T23:53:00.000-04:002006-08-25T02:03:12.476-04:00

The sky is big and blue, riddled with small clouds catching the orange light of the setting sun. Waiting for the train to stop, still looking at the sky, I thought it looked special. Watching a sky like that, you’d almost want to believe life is beautiful. On the way home, there is a police car in front of the church. There is also a hearse for that teenager that got shot down last weekend on the

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1155366479771714182006-08-12T03:07:00.000-04:002006-08-12T03:10:29.016-04:00

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1154616117453686232006-08-03T10:41:00.000-04:002006-08-03T10:44:02.560-04:00

42nd street - Winter 2005

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1153108439039382622006-06-29T23:40:00.000-04:002006-07-17T00:07:45.583-04:00

... and somebody else picked up the phone.Over the phone the voice is yelling: "Who is this?"-- Er... Cecyl.-- Oh! Are you fucking my wife, Cecyl? Are you the motherfucker who is fucking my wife?!Obviously, that was a bad time to make that call. Or my reputation precedes me. Oddly enough, I'm in the clear this time. Go figure. Also, there's this great feeling. The same you experience while being

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1148195934409757412006-05-21T02:31:00.000-04:002006-05-21T03:20:08.603-04:00

This is a blog about nothing. Or so it seems. There's been plenty of exciting news lately though. A new job -- and I mean a real one with my own desk and business card and all. A new visa. Real weekends, because when you have a real job, one is enough.So what now? For the first time in months, and I mean many months, I have free time and my checking accounts proudly shows a 4-digit number in the

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1144496999616458502006-04-08T07:49:00.000-04:002006-04-08T07:51:31.566-04:00

i hate to get up early in the morning i hate to get up early in the morning i hate to get up early in the morning i hate to get up early in the morning i hate to get up early in the morning i hate to get up early in the morning i hate to get up early in the morning i hate to get up early in the morning i hate to get up

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1144477025234961472006-04-08T02:13:00.000-04:002006-04-08T02:19:02.473-04:00

I'm late. Not with my period, stupid. The rent. Again. Hate that. Don't you?Two months in a row...Last Sunday afternoon was sitting on the bed with the jar where I keep small change, and patiently sorting out quarters, dimes and nickels and putting them into paper rolls.Bankers, they are lazier than you think. They won't take your change if it's not in rolls. If you work in a restaurant, they

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1143324080151589222006-03-25T16:40:00.000-05:002006-03-25T17:01:20.216-05:00

I suppose I could blame it on hunger.They are tons of shitty jobs in the world. Handing out leaflets to New Yorkers is one of them. Or trying to. Especially on the Upper West Side. That's why I usually take them. Make someone happy. Sometimes I remember to trash it a couple blocks away, but most of the time I absentmindedly shove it in my pocket and forget about it until a few weeks later I have

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1141382707676325362006-03-03T05:29:00.000-05:002006-03-03T05:55:50.180-05:00

It's always 5 a.m. here. An hour just as good as any other to be looking for a job, I suppose.Outside, some guys are shooting at each other. It's not like I'm keeping stats of that or anything, but I have a hunch that I hear more gunshots during winter than summer around here. It doesn't make sense. Maybe I should start keeping stats after all. Entre le gel et la neige, moi je trouve que c'est

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1141294861290563972006-03-02T05:18:00.000-05:002006-03-02T15:36:42.046-05:00

Introducing Shorty a.k.a. February.The rent. I'm short.Calling in all debts.This year, there are 28 days in February. Really, who has time to think about this kind of detail?The things you got to do to pay the rent. Like ask your boss for an immediate advance on this week pay. Even if it works, you're still short. But it doesn't work anyway.So you take a break, go to a pay phone and call people."

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1140852436905624852006-02-25T02:14:00.000-05:002006-02-28T02:57:01.646-05:00

After a few drinks at The Bar tonight, leaning against one of Essex station red steel pillar, I watch a baby mouse running on one of the rails.It's tiny little legs skipping on the cold metal as it tries to get traction. It's been a long day. Tomorrow will be even longer. The buzz isn't gone yet. I just want the train to come and take me home. As I watch it, I think that this stupid little mouse

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1140850682107690142006-02-25T01:34:00.000-05:002006-02-25T02:58:16.236-05:00

It’s a nice bar. Kind of low key. Because it’s still early there’s no crowd.Friday night’s crowd sucks. Same for Saturday’s.It’s a nice table. Sometimes, things can be just like that. The little candle throwing it’s shivering glow across the dark wood of the table. A friend of mine, he could tell you what kind of wood anything was just by touching it. Sure, he would look at it. But always he

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1140229321216107542006-02-17T21:09:00.000-05:002006-02-17T21:22:01.226-05:00

next principle use here few. mischievous a friends off studied? again leader commit edge anybody,different tying embarrass,anybody carefully whom turning? you reply you. force my carefully use out already.few goes bought shining. black force carefully sugar him. being shining evening.off sugar here servants.That's what I got in my mailbox today. Not in the spambox. This one's full of penis

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1140032080153293952006-02-15T14:33:00.000-05:002006-02-15T14:34:40.210-05:00

The Epic of New York City : A Narrative Historyby Edward Robb EllisRich with details and anecdotes. A must read if you have any interest in NYC history.See more about The Epic of New York City : A Narrative History

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1139987584926834142006-02-15T01:58:00.000-05:002006-02-15T02:17:05.173-05:00

This is where I go to puke. By now, you should have noticed. So watch your shoes when you step in here.You can start a new life. Or you can kill your blog. Or you can take it somewhere else. Start a new life.I'm tired of bitching. Something gotta happen. For better or worse.This smoking thing is getting way out of hand. Stop smoking and when you start again, it's worse than before. I know how to

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1139467487543879362006-02-09T01:43:00.000-05:002006-02-09T01:44:47.553-05:00

Fuck this job.Fuck it.Fuck.

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1139296646436921152006-02-07T02:15:00.000-05:002006-02-07T02:17:26.446-05:00

These days, I want to put the world into a small, neat, tight ball and throw it as far as I can.

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1139189200712894592006-02-05T20:24:00.000-05:002006-02-05T20:26:40.726-05:00

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1138949442030880492006-02-03T01:41:00.000-05:002006-02-03T03:10:59.936-05:00

This computer is so dead. Fucking piece of cheap crap. Fucking ingrate!Got a blue screen as I was writing. Had to reboot.The thing that worries me is something like that. This computer is way too unstable now. It's way too old. It's way too fucking slow.Also, sometimes I have those puzzling messages when a green arrow icon pops up in the toolbar, and a window error window open, telling me that I

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1138872950699818012006-02-02T04:35:00.000-05:002006-02-05T20:42:11.433-05:00

Over the phone, J. says: "You sure you don't mind?" I reassure him. It's midnight, I just got home.Over the phone there is a pause. Then he talks again. "You know, I don't feel like doing this now. If I could, I would wait till tomorrow." He says his girl is not strong enough. He says he's exhausted. To tell the truth, I am too and I wish I wouldn't have to do this.But on the phone I say, "It's

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1137843666553854932006-01-21T06:42:00.000-05:002006-01-21T16:45:34.163-05:00

It came back. The ipod, I mean. No explanation came with it, though. A couple days later, it simply reappeared on top of my keyboard where it is sleeping as I'm typing this, nested against the "F1/2 etc." keys. I let it there for a few more days, untouched, hesitating between putting it back in the trash myself as a matter of principle, or just put it in my pocket and use it.I have no shame. I

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1136106380790201472006-01-01T03:29:00.000-05:002006-01-01T04:06:24.976-05:00

I usually say that December is my favorite month of the year. It might have something to do with the fact that it's my birthday month. Maybe not. This particular December month sucked, though. Maybe it's because I had no time to stop and feel it.For one week, I had an ipod. I became addicted to it. Especially since I don't have a CD burner and most of my music is on my computer. Today, I lost the

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1135387082920926092005-12-23T19:50:00.000-05:002005-12-25T21:10:15.396-05:00

Went to the Rockefeller today. It wasn't planned. Just thought I'd go and see that tree after I showed up at school for the first time of the week only to find a closed door. Buying a ticket took about 3 minutes, and that's because the girl behind the desk looked cute. I think that no more than 10 minutes passed between the moment I bought the ticket and the moment I was in the elevator, looking

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1135021760256155732005-12-19T14:30:00.000-05:002005-12-19T14:49:20.346-05:00

When I was in France, I would regularly dream of New York. Then I would wake up in a non-New York place, and be very disappointed. At this point, I can't think of living anywhere else. Maybe it would be wise to move West, or just away from the megalopolises that attracts so many immigrants that we are canceling each other chances of making it here. I don't know.The strange thing is I've been

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1135020636289256162005-12-19T14:23:00.000-05:002005-12-19T14:30:36.300-05:00

I know I'm clearly not updating this as often as I should. The thing is I have tons of excuses to explain what, ranging from computer failure to secretly saving the world of aliens who have sworn to exterminate the human race. And everything in between.Posting pics is usually the post of the lazy but I don't even do that. So, yep, bad, bad, bad.

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1134029088403919872005-12-08T03:01:00.000-05:002005-12-08T03:04:48.413-05:00

I would like to thank the guy at Blogger.com who came up with the idea of the "Recover post" option and who thus saved part of the previous post.

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1134026967250133712005-12-08T02:28:00.000-05:002005-12-08T03:09:15.463-05:00

You think you need to stop. At night, you tell yourself "I'm gonna take a day and figure this out. Make a decision." But this is New York. Things don't work that way here. There's always a bus to catch, stairs to rush down to catch a train. There's always new projects popping up that demand a squeeze in your schedule. There's always people you want to see but you can't. There's always people you

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1131694934538006332005-11-11T02:40:00.000-05:002005-11-12T03:17:51.056-05:00

... and it made a funny, musical "pop!" and then at last I updated the sidebar

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1131430895746016032005-11-08T01:20:00.000-05:002005-11-08T01:28:55.226-05:00

On the way home, every night, there are two necessary stops. One, I guess you could call it the Burger Stop. The other, the Coca-Cola stop. Usually, the most interesting and unexpected things tend to happen at the Burger stop. Quite often, it takes the form of a black guy in various state of drunkenness or stoniness asking me for money.But not tonight.Tonight, the interesting thing happened quite

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1131135592413968422005-11-04T15:02:00.000-05:002005-11-04T15:19:52.476-05:00

That was a while ago now. Maybe a month. Maybe more. After they’ve finally uninstalled all the scaffoldings surrounding Grand Central Station. The magnificent front is back, for all to see, its stones whiter than ever. I want to think it looked exactly like that when it was built. Only the people swarming inside its proud marble walls were looking different. Having to walk through Grand Central

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1130480307090007122005-10-28T02:15:00.000-04:002005-11-18T14:18:51.930-05:00

If it wasn't for 3 pairs of socks and 3 underwear miraculously found, I wouldn't be writing now. I would be doing a laundry. I haven't blogged in a while and a lot has happened since then. A lot, and nothing. Any attempt on my part to give a linear account of what happened is bound to fail. Past days and nights merge together in a formless conglomerate.That was a couple months ago: That was

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1127972888895874622005-09-29T01:38:00.000-04:002005-10-26T00:09:25.460-04:00

I'm house-sitting and cat-sitting at the same time. That's why I'm in the UPS. They have rats here too. Just as big as in Brooklyn. The other night, one of them ran between my feet as I was walking. Almost tripped on the little fucker.It's quiet here otherwise. No hispanic or rap music at full blast.I have been assigned also to read those galleys. Those in the "All Consuming" list below. Deadline

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1127971487761130212005-09-23T01:08:00.000-04:002005-09-29T01:37:49.306-04:00

I'm catsitting. This can be a dangerous activity, but so far, everything is fine. It's in the Upper West Side, so it's kind of a different neighborhood I'm living in right now. The other day, I had to walk crosstown from my job in the Upper East Side. I walked on 58, I think. One of the most expensive area in New York. It was a Friday night. At a cross street, a tall Asian girl with high heels, a

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1126931114767698602005-09-17T00:14:00.000-04:002005-09-17T00:26:21.986-04:00

I can't think of a part in my body that is not aching. I can't remember when was the last time I had a day off. Cash should start flowing in soon. It's funny the way every time my situation is about to start looking better, there's some more shit coming in. Like one of my bosses -- probably the most honest and reliable I've ever met in NYC -- tells me he doesn't know how to keep me working for

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1126158077628316252005-09-08T01:40:00.000-04:002005-09-08T01:41:17.636-04:00

You Passed the US Citizenship TestCongratulations - you got 8 out of 10 correct!Could You Pass the US Citizenship Test?

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1126123529766953212005-09-07T16:02:00.000-04:002005-09-07T16:05:29.813-04:00

I paid for the Internet. My roommate couldn't.$105 to install a new connection. Now we are on cable. Everything is on cable at home now. Except maybe the microwave. I'm not even sure.The Internet is not the problem.The problem is that my old CRT monitor is dying. It started just two days after our connection came back. Everything that should be white is grayish. Anything that is not white goes

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1125953851970411132005-09-05T16:54:00.000-04:002005-09-05T17:00:27.843-04:00

"It appears that the money has been moved in the president’s budget to handle homeland security and the war in Iraq, and I suppose that’s the price we pay. Nobody locally is happy that the levees can’t be finished, and we are doing everything we can to make the case that this is a security issue for us."-- Walter Maestri, emergency management chief for Jefferson Parish, Louisiana; New Orleans

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1125715304281763202005-09-02T22:39:00.000-04:002005-09-02T22:41:44.286-04:00

So, I guess I'll never see New Orleans. Not the New Orleans I wanted to see, that is.All the pain and suffering and destruction -- maybe not all, but a lot of it -- the result of politicians' wrong bet. The same dumbasses you can find in Venice, Italy, for instance. Betting against the odds. Betting that they won't be the ones in charge the day the shit hit the fan. And really, that's all that

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1124478483137869452005-08-19T15:07:00.000-04:002005-08-19T15:08:40.080-04:00

One full week without the Internet now.And counting...

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1124131988262260272005-08-15T14:49:00.000-04:002005-08-15T14:53:08.270-04:00

So someone at home didn't pay the phone/internet bill so there's been no internet at home since Friday. A lot of money is overdue, and it won't be paid until my roommate returns from holiday. *sigh*

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1123655800636727792005-08-10T02:30:00.000-04:002005-08-10T02:40:05.623-04:00

Mercédès Mercédès où es-tu petite fille aux cheveux noirs ombre filant dans les rues des grandes cités les yeux rasant les trottoirs les coudes de ton manteau rasant les murs ne pas toucher do not touch achtung PELIGRO que fais tu que vas tu faire d’où viens tu où vas tu si tu vas . . . va . . .voiture sous la pluie les gouttes tantôt fines tantôt épaisses roulant glissant sur la carrosserie s’

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1123622656673740092005-08-08T23:45:00.000-04:002005-08-09T23:08:14.706-04:00

I'm late for school. It's the first day and I'm late. I am late because of the MTA. I'm late because it's my first day and I don't want to go there. I know it's not going to be a lot of fun.After a stop at the administrative office, I find my classroom. I knock on the door and open without waiting for an invitation. I'm 40 minutes late. The teacher looks at me while I find my way in the middle of

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1123267442833358292005-08-05T14:44:00.000-04:002005-08-05T14:48:02.866-04:00

Upper-Something... Upper-East side, I think - New York, Spring 2005

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1123134602080656532005-08-04T00:18:00.000-04:002005-08-09T23:09:18.453-04:00

For some reason I keep thinking about that these days. Why the fuck did Rimbaud go to Africa?Why didn't he go to America instead? He could have met Walt Whitman. He could have gone to South America too.What would have happened if he had seen New York, Mexico or Jamaica?

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1123035550800335782005-08-02T21:58:00.000-04:002005-08-03T04:17:39.076-04:00

It happens again. So I reach over to the little table and grab a couple of Lexomil that I swallow down with a coke and wait for the little white pills to work for me.Last night I dreamt that the Immigration was after me. It's ridiculous. I have a visa. Not the one I had dreamed of, but this one will have to make do. There's no one out there to get me. Except in my dream. And because I'm reading

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1123058450137094412005-07-31T04:17:00.000-04:002005-08-04T02:21:31.183-04:00

P. and I are sitting at a table outside of a small restaurant in the Lower East Side. She says that during her stay in the City this week she noticed I had changed. She says she wants to see me eat. She thinks I'm starving. She says that she's treating me to a panini sandwich, which she assure me are excellent here. I look at the menu but I don't understand a word of what's in front of me. All I

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1123036896275190582005-07-29T22:21:00.000-04:002005-08-02T22:43:38.730-04:00

So P. came from upstate to do a one week training at Jean Georges. I'm not a big fan of top restaurants. Which is probably why Sara insisted so much to invite me there for lunch. She made a reservation through P. which also probably explains why we got so many freebies.I arrived 10 minutes late at the Trump tower. Really, the MTA is getting on my nerves these days. I don't mind the random

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1122360624117434282005-07-26T02:32:00.000-04:002005-07-26T11:33:41.460-04:00

So it seems that the launch will take place tomorrow, after all. Nobody seems to give a fuck now, but launching something into space remains a challenge, especially if it is a manned aircraft -- and a particularly dangerous one. I suppose the NASA guys know what they are doing but I don't have a good feeling about all this and how the NASA people dodge questions about the chances of success. It's

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1122323732971679682005-07-25T16:35:00.000-04:002005-07-25T16:37:36.876-04:00

CAUGHT STEALING, by Charlie Huston. (Ballantine, 2004)

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1122323188923698192005-07-25T16:26:00.000-04:002005-07-25T16:29:43.653-04:00

Brooklyn Bridge -- Brooklyn, June 2005

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1122091130783461122005-07-22T23:37:00.000-04:002005-08-02T16:03:03.460-04:00

You've also had some of those days. I hope you did. The only way it makes sense is to believe that Jealous (God's real name according to the Good Book itself) realized that maybe he was a little heavy on you on the shit throwing and you deserve a little break of some sort.The day I'm talking about is Thursday 21st. Thursday qualifies as the best day I had in quite a long time. Two days before,

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1122079956431205392005-07-22T20:44:00.000-04:002005-07-22T20:52:36.440-04:00

What if we were each other's mistake -- each other bad habit?Unable to leave each other and doomed never to make another step further.How you do when you love someone but you know you have to move on?

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1121450798526352292005-07-15T14:06:00.000-04:002005-07-15T14:10:12.310-04:00

Near City Hall, Manhattan -- June 2005

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1121283081012655662005-07-13T14:29:00.000-04:002005-07-14T02:24:44.820-04:00

First off, I have some friends in Great Britain. I've never been there myself, but what I'm talking about here is not the English people, but the British government and its policy.If you go to Paris or any of the big cities of France for that matter, you'll see that public trash are clear plastic bags attached to a metallic rim. It has not always been like that.If you go to a train or subway

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1120963681619718122005-07-09T22:48:00.000-04:002005-07-09T22:51:06.586-04:00

Manhattan Bridge -- Brooklyn, June 2005

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1120962029105893092005-07-04T23:09:00.000-04:002005-07-09T22:20:29.113-04:00

I'm on the roof of my building. I was supposed to go to some friend's place near the Manhattan Bridge, on the Manhattan side of the river, but there was a problem in the organization. So I just stayed home, knowing it was too late to take the train to go to the city and find a nice place. If I was lucky, I knew maybe I could catch a sight of the fireworks while the train was crossing the

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1120448741835218182005-07-03T23:45:00.000-04:002005-07-09T22:52:38.520-04:00

Little Italy, May 2005

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1120963309012132302005-07-01T22:27:00.000-04:002005-07-09T22:41:49.020-04:00

It's incredible how shit never just seems to stop coming my way. I don't mean to be writing here just to bitch all the time. But, man, if I could write down here all the shit that keeps happening...It's like, as soon as I solve a situation, and I manage to bring things back to normal, a new one pops up. And in the background, there are all the other things I have no power to change by myself.

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1119680521967971462005-06-25T02:17:00.000-04:002005-06-25T02:37:49.890-04:00

This girl, her voice is hot. Usually, what I call a hot voice for a girl, is when it's not clear. I like girls who talk in a naturally low, hoarse voice. Not too hoarse. Not man hoarse. But like the day after they spent the whole night screaming at a concert. Low as in "not loud."But this girl, she has a hot voice that is crystal clear and young and innocent. Though it's not in a language I

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1119672940324060232005-06-25T00:15:00.000-04:002005-06-25T00:23:22.743-04:00

39th st. — June 2005

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1119505670308262102005-06-23T01:43:00.000-04:002005-06-23T01:52:00.820-04:00

I should go to the laundry. No, there's no emergency. What I meant is, it's one in the morning and I don't feel like doing anything. So I probably should go to the laundry. Except I won't of course.These past weeks have been busy. It feels good to be working on several projects at the same time again, even if they are just temporary.So this company producing documentaries went to Europe to take

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1119436700232746292005-06-22T06:37:00.000-04:002005-06-22T06:38:20.236-04:00

After I came back from work, worked all night on a translation to meet the deadline.

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1118989708327475892005-06-16T23:53:00.000-04:002005-06-17T02:28:28.336-04:00

Really too busy to update this thing.Today, I had a big surprise, though. My brother's girlfriend was supposed to arrive tomorrow, but when I came back home tonight after work, she was waiting for me.The thing is, last year, when she came to visit, we were supposed to meet at Port Authority but we didn't have the time to agree on any specific meeting spot beforehand so it took me two hours to

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1118220989677289582005-06-08T04:52:00.000-04:002005-06-08T05:06:18.606-04:00

Leen and I are in a cab in Lower East Side, riding north to Grand Central. I'm here to help her carry her bags. For a girl who's going to spend a couple of weeks in Australia, I have to grant her that she knows the meaning of "traveling light."In the cab, she gives me 6 tiny, pentagon-shaped pills of Adavan. I say, Thank you. I say, I'll pay you back with Lexomil when my brother's girlfriend

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1118219964326349832005-06-08T04:29:00.000-04:002005-06-08T04:58:00.213-04:00

...me.It's been a week now since I was told they hired someone else.Otherwise, right now I would be a literary agent. I wouldn't have to worry about visas anymore, I wouldn't have to worry about the rent anymore, I wouldn't have to worry about being able to see my grandparents again, I wouldn't have to worry about keeping this crappy computer I'm using now...Fuck. That job was for me really. But

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1117939411011006002005-06-03T23:13:00.000-04:002005-06-04T23:33:28.753-04:00

It's when the guy says on the microphone that the store will close in 30 minutes that I realize I've been in Barnes and Noble for about 3 hours.It's been 3 hours and I've checked all the fiction shelves and the philosophy shelves and the history shelves and the "Who knew?" shelves and I just couldn't decide on what to buy. I was looking forward to that moment, though. But after the first 1/2 hour

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1117941495259055752005-06-01T23:15:00.000-04:002005-06-04T23:18:15.266-04:00

I'm in the 4 or 5 downtown express train and I just can't focus anymore on the book I'm reading. It's around 3 in the morning and the train is almost empty and I'm slightly drunk. Just a little bit, really. Mostly, I'm worried.I have to constantly read again whole paragraphs and pages to remind me of who's who and what's going on. So I give up and turn around on the empty plastic bench so that I

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1117681081210584722005-06-01T22:55:00.000-04:002005-06-04T23:21:18.576-04:00

like you want to write real bad but whatever comes out just plain sucks so when the little box on the screen asks you whether you're sure you want to leave that unsaved page you just say "fuck yeah" and click OK and there's no more bad writing

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1116830527749840282005-05-23T02:38:00.000-04:002005-05-23T02:42:07.756-04:00

I don't want to be like that -- expecting. I can't help it. I don't want to write emails to friends. I don't want to go see a movie. Books I read are stale.I just can't think about anything else. The month is ending soon. A reply should come anytime now. This week. A positive email means my life will get a lot easier than it is now. A negative one means I'll get plenty of bullets to bite.Let's

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1116830866343750822005-05-23T02:23:00.000-04:002005-05-23T02:47:46.346-04:00

Je suis avec M., une de mes ex. C’est la première fois qu’on se parle en 2 ans. Tous les mauvais sentiments ont disparus et nous sommes de nouveau amis. Notre complicité réapparait presque immédiatement. Elle est désormais amoureuse d’un auteur. Je l’accompagne chez lui. Il est plus âgé qu’elle. Il a eu une vie mouvementée. C’est un homme jeune qui nous ouvre la porte de l’appartement et nous

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1116052427103103842005-05-14T02:30:00.000-04:002005-05-14T02:33:47.120-04:00

no, they don't. you try to do everything according to the rules and it still doesn't seem to want to work out. my visa expires at the end of the month and i don't know whether it'll get renewed or not.they try to sell us that free world thing, that global village thing, but really, i don't buy it. not for everybody.it would be so much easier to just be illegal. i don't want it, though. but i

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1115872436715799012005-05-11T23:54:00.000-04:002005-05-12T00:49:03.056-04:00

People on TV, they have great lives. Even when they seem down and their situation desperate, problems and challenges are always overcome, eventually. Sometimes, they just vanish. And if they die it doesn't matter because they have "found peace" and they are ready to leave anyway.I'm talking about sitcoms and movies.Tonight I went to watch UNLEASHED with Sara on 2nd Avenue and 12th street.New York

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1115740053502046692005-05-07T23:12:00.000-04:002005-05-10T11:55:48.313-04:00

She arrives as the brunch is about to end. The old, fat guy with her must be her father.You know, in books, when they say stuff like, "She had the face of an angel"-- and you think that it doesn't mean anything and really even cheap writers should know better than use that cliche? Well, sometimes a girl with beautiful long, curly red hair and blue eyes sits on table 7 with an old, fat guy that

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1115278170800203832005-05-05T03:24:00.000-04:002005-05-05T17:53:39.870-04:00

Another fire alert down the block as I'm writing this. At least I suppose it's a fire alert. Four fire trucks are blocking the street, illuminating it with their flashing lights.(later:)Or maybe a gas leak... which would explain the loud pneumatic drill at four in the morning...

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1115271735953056802005-05-03T01:19:00.000-04:002005-05-05T01:42:16.070-04:00

At around noon today there was police cars and fire trucks in the street again. Our building is at a corner, and from the building diagonally opposed to ours there was a thick grey smoke coming out the window. People in the streets. Then the cops and firemen arrived. Some of the firemen entered the building, others went on the roof using their big ladder, while one seemed to have a hell of a time

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1115222558766672652005-05-01T23:41:00.000-04:002005-05-04T12:02:38.960-04:00

Tatie Danielle exists. To see her, you had to be at [for obvious reasons I cannot disclose here the restaurant's name] Sunday in early afternoon. Tatie Danielle wears expensive clothes and rings and she is with another old woman. A wanna be Tatie Danielle, but too submissive.Tatie Danielle wants everything right away. Tatie Danielle wants to eat something that is not on the menu. Tatie Danielle

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1115103146127857872005-04-30T02:49:00.000-04:002005-05-03T02:53:38.463-04:00

The voice over went well. The boss said that it should take about 2 hours when I arrived at about 6pm, but I knew it would take longer than that.I love public readings. I love documentaries. I like to read out loud when I'm alone sometimes. Just to try the words. Sometimes a text gets even better when read out loud. Sometimes not.Anyway, she said it would only take a couple hours but I knew it'd

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1114795162919843032005-04-29T13:16:00.000-04:002005-04-29T13:37:35.463-04:00

Can’t stay in place.Today, I’m supposed to do my first professional voice-over for the documentary I just translated, but they still haven’t told me when it’s supposed to happen. Hello guys!... pick up the phone already.But that’s not the only reason I’m all nervous. Any day now, I’m going to receive an email. Now, depending on the content of the email it’s going to be heaven or hell. Well, not

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1114652202576942592005-04-27T21:34:00.000-04:002005-04-28T14:48:51.813-04:00

My life is all humbling moments. I suppose that’s what George would say. You know. George. In Seinfeld.So I’m given this great opportunity to translate a documentary on NASA into French. That was last week. Deadline is this Friday and it’s done already. It wasn’t easy though. And not for the reasons that would first come to mind. The reason was that the English version was so badly written.The

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1114310167693182522005-04-21T22:19:00.000-04:002005-04-23T22:42:11.076-04:00

So it's a beautiful day and I'm going to Manhattan but, know what, I'm not even late, I have a translation assignment (hell, I have two!) and because of the sun and Spring and all girls look beautiful and seriously cut down the number of clothes layers. I'm two steps from the stairs of the Kosciusko station when I notice that Kennedy's (the local burger joint that could be my official sponsor if

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1113333154386933822005-04-12T15:12:00.000-04:002005-04-12T15:15:23.133-04:00

Broadway, Brooklyn -- Hiver 2005

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1112333091477650862005-04-01T00:27:00.000-05:002005-04-01T00:56:18.740-05:00

Tonight went to watch this. J. was supposed to be there too but I fucked up and arrived late. He had his ticket but assumed he wouldn't make it through the security because I was the one with all the information. He left to meet his girlfriend instead.The movie was great. While watching I had hoped that J. was somewhere in the audience. It's only after the movie I managed to get in touch with him

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1112209316010269962005-03-30T14:01:00.000-05:002005-03-30T14:01:56.010-05:00

Also reading:L'ARBRE DES POSSIBLES, by Bernard WerberMETS TON DOIGT OU J'AI MON DOIGT, by San-AntonioPYTHAGORE, JE T'ADORE, by Patrick Cauvin

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1112167670213104172005-03-30T02:25:00.000-05:002005-03-30T11:35:17.766-05:00

You got 16 out of 20 correct No pressure here, pal. We're all brothers and sisters. But can you do better?

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1112128625839194552005-03-29T15:34:00.000-05:002005-03-29T15:37:05.846-05:00

(re)Reading LA PESTE, by Albert Camus.(re)Reading MON CULTE SUR LA COMMODE, by San-Antonio (who is undoubtedly the most fascinating and talented French writer of all times)Reading PORTS OF ENTRY: WILLIAM S. BURROUGHS AND THE ARTSReading NOUVELLES SOUS ECSTASY, by Frederic Beigbeder. (I feel all ashamed and dirty to admit I'm reading this --just finished it actually. But hey, it's the first time

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1112052809632145972005-03-28T18:31:00.000-05:002005-03-28T18:33:29.633-05:00

Columbia said no. I had no idea how I would have paid for it anyway, would they have accepted me.

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1111896540045856952005-03-26T23:07:00.000-05:002005-03-27T00:49:44.623-05:00

"La grande cité silencieuse n’était plus alors qu’un assemblage de cubes massifs et inertes, entre lesquels les effigies taciturnes de bienfaiteurs oubliés ou d’anciens grands hommes étouffés à jamais dans le bronze s’essayaient seules, avec leurs faux visages de pierre ou de fer, à évoquer une image dégradée de ce qui avait été l’homme. Ces idoles médiocres trônaient sous un ciel épais, dans les

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1111741893856343412005-03-25T04:11:00.000-05:002005-03-25T04:27:37.900-05:00

The last days have been weird. In spite of myself, I found myself caught in the Terri Schiavo's debate. I mean, not literally. But it's hard not to read a blog or a newspaper article in which the author doesn't put his or her two cents.But I don't remember being scared like that in a long time. It is obviously not this poor woman who scares me but the way religious fanatics used her unfortunate

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8366164.post-1111201989243821572005-03-18T22:13:00.000-05:002005-03-21T14:36:46.193-05:00

Listening to: Tom WaitsFor some reason it started at the Public Library on 40th st. and 5th. I already have a Brooklyn Library card but I also wanted a New York one. I showed a letter, filled in a form and got my red and blue library card that I immediately put to work by taking Amy Hempel's AT THE GATES OF ANIMAL KINGDOM -- a book that you cannot find under $75 (secondhand, paperback edition.)

Cecylhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755862147212266839noreply@blogger.com2